Sensual

  So this is kinda of a weird blog post for me... then again maybe not.

 Like I said in previous posts- I feel like that I am well very sensual and or sexual. There are days when I wake up in the morning and all day long I feel like the biggest sex magnet ever. I feel like I move in a sensual way sometimes. I know that sensuality isnt exactly tied with matters of sexual terms- just being in touch with my body.

Yeah, I will say i am a Christian and I have gotten closer to God. However- it is very hard to stay in a Christian mind-set. Well- I should say more on Jesus. And it is totally hard being a young Christian woman. Sometimes, honestly- I just want to relish in my womanly nature. I want to embrace my sexuality. The road to my "becoming a woman" journey is well emotionally and mentally exhausting.

 When Im feeling sexy and all that- I feel bad at times.. When Im wearing my tank tops and pajama pants I notice my figure is flattered. I have round hips, well endowed in the "upstairs and downstairs" or what my mother calls " table in the back".  I know what I was born with but when the physical urge comes on me- whether Im in the car, home, in bed.. or even worse.. IN CHURCH.

Quick story: The first time I noticed that my " desired hips full of fire" ( A potential lyric of a song I wanna write) was in church. In. The. Front. Row. While my uncle was preaching. I was like really hormones please stop- at the first sign of the sensation I was whincing on the inside.  When I turned 20- my body began to change.  Like 24/7...I wanted to scream. 

 

Forgive me if I write about this so often- But I feel like sometimes I would if I could write a sensual song about my body wanting to be ravished but you know.. i dont think some overly deep religous people wouldnt appreciate my lyrics... like for example :

"  Im dying for the first tender touch- Some call it lust

   Aching for it so bad I could cry and scream out to God why

  I wanna know what it feels like

  Take me, rip it off- tell me bout that life"

 

Yes I made that up... Lol I know people would be like why would you write lyrics like mainstream? Well, sex is pretty much mainstream but I wanna make it once again that special moment that its meant to be. I sometimes feel like I radiate sex.. especially sex appeal.. looking in the mirror sometimes strictly at my face alone forget my body-- my face has attracted a lot of attention. My eyes I feel like are seductive, my lips call out " come here", my breasts are huge, my tummy is soft, my legs are curvy, I mean really... dang Lord are you trying to have me look like I could use some loving? Even my voice is well as my endearing, sweet, a little deep and sexy. ( According to my boyfriend) My singing voice is like whooooooaaaa.. I like it when im singing in my sensual deep voice.

 

I prayed so many times to God asking him to not have me feel like that or even ashamed of my body and sexuality. I sometimes mess up and end up crying- heck even when I dont i cry..

 

Im a crying sensual mess.

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Comments (2)

  1. thuglife1971

    MMMMMM MMMM MMMM BABY YOU DONE ALREADY KNOW IMA MAKE YOUR BODY AND YOUR LOVE JUICES FLOW WITH FIREY PASSION MAKE YOU’RE BODY TINGLE FROM YO HEAD DOWN TO YO TOES AS I KISS LICK SUCK FEEL SQUEEZE RUB YOUR BODY UP AND DOWN BABY YOU KNOW IMA DRIVE YOU EVEN MORE CRAZIER THEN YO HOT SEXY PHAT AMAZING BODY EVER WAS AND YO MIND GIRL FOR GET CLOUD 9 IMA TAKE YOUR BODY MIND SPIRIT AND SOUL TO PLACES AIN’T NO MAN EVER TAKE A WOMAN BEFORE CAUSE BABY IMA PUT IT DOWN ON YOU REAL GOOD IMA TOUCH YO BODY IN ALL THE RIGHT SPOTS TAKE MY TIME BUILD IT UP THEN KICK IT INTO OVERDRIVE TILL YOU CAN’T GET ENOUGH TILL YOU SQUIRT ALL OVER BOTH OF US EVEN THEN I AIN’T GONNA STOP IMA KEEP AT IT LIKE A MARATHON THAT NEVER END CAUSE IM LIKE THE ENEGIZER BUNNY IMA KEEP GOING AND GOING YOU BEST BELIEVE BABY AFTER IM DONE WITH YOU THE ONLY THING YOU GONNA THINK OF IS ECSTACY CAUSE THAT’S WERE IM GON TAKE YOU BABY BEST BELIEVE………… I LOVE YOU GIRL

    January 26, 2014
  2. blackbeauty2013

    dang lol umm even though i wasnt tryin to protray that message lol.. i was juss writing. I am blushing though thanks a lot dang freak.. i dont even know what else to say.. That’s very sensual and very detailed s why I wrote this post in the first place- I am a sensually and beautifully natured woman- so you lucky

    January 26, 2014